A hiatus from Bikram + odd food choices = A combo platter of crap

“Have mercy baby” — the opening lyrics from the song “Descender” by the Black Crowes were rolling through my noggin this morning as I prepped for my first Bikram class in about a month. I was looking for mercy from the Bikram gods because I had a feeling my return was gonna be a bumpy one. Why it took me so long to get back into it isn’t much of a mystery. But the main reason is laziness, and perhaps the brutal heat that enveloped this city the last few weeks. I just wasn’t in the mood to voluntarily go bend, stretch and pull in a 110-degree room when all I had to do was just walk outside. Why bother? It was easier to sit in the AC and read.

Only one of the regulars was in the morning class. The rest were strangers and it makes me wonder if the regulars are taking the summer off. There was a new teacher too. Some dude named Alan. He was good, a little lacking in the yap-yap area, but he proved he was paying attention when he said my Standing Bow was “awesome.” That made my awareness of the crap leaching from my pores less nauseating. Yes, I could feel all of the bad food choices I made over the past month leaving from my system in a very ugly manner. Also, a quick glance in the mirror showed that my face was a titch puffier than the last time I was in class, but knowing how my body works, that puffiness will be no more in about a week. My cheekbones will be jutting out again soon. Too bad my ass is already jutting out — and not in a good way. It’s not quite like hers, yet, but it could be if I don’t do something about it soon. I have no desire to have a shelf-butt. Sure, I’d be popular at parties, but, is having a shelf-butt a McCrabass trait?

Don’t answer that.

Post-class I noticed both my balance and flexibility were still intact. I breathed a huge sigh of relief because it took so damn long to get them thar traits back on track.

‘Tis the little things, really.

One thought on “A hiatus from Bikram + odd food choices = A combo platter of crap

Push it out, shove it out, waaaaay out...

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