Apple pie a la beaver butt anyone?

Folks, you all know that I am constantly striving to make myself smarter than your mopey asses, and today I believe this Herculean effort has been achieved — thanks to my good friend, the Goddess Professor.

Goddess Professor is like the wee bit older friend you had when you were a youngin’, hangin’ out on the hammock in the backyard, who taught us about the the gross stuff that your family refused to teach you. Under the tutelage of people like Deborah, we learned that yes indeed the two men living in the same house down the street were not just ‘roommates’, and the vicar really is a womanizing drunk.

We all had a friend like her, and today we’re better people for it.

Fortunately for me and for you, we have Deborah watch over and guide us through middle age with more additives to enrich our dull-as-fuck lives.

Now, show of hands — who wants ice cream with all sorts of toppings — mainly baked goods, gravies, gelatin/puddings and alcohol?

My question is, why should beavers’ butts be crushed for, well, anything???

10 thoughts on “Apple pie a la beaver butt anyone?

  1. My “Deborah” was Cousin Sue. Now a retired RN on disability (she worked one too many night shifts in the ER), she became certified nuts in three different States. When her meds were tweaked just right, she was loads of fun, full of pranks, hoards of inappropriate ditties, songs and information that we teenagers drooled at getting our hands on for mere shock value passage. I liked her because she was adopted like me, which made us different, not “related” to these people who raised us. Plus she was a great singer. She would break into song, mainly show tunes or Godspell and would change the words to her liking… Mainly dark, grimey dirty words.

    I could see her very clearly and intelligently (with nary a smirk) explaining how… “The Canadians grind up Beaver tail to dispense upon many food types, but especially ice cream, because if cured and processed properly, the finest of Beaver tail can liken itself to fine roasted Pistachios. It’s an aphrodisiac you know! Now lets go smoke some banana rinds.”

    Me, I’m going to go enjoy a fine Chianti… Sigh…

  2. Looking over that list, it seems impossible to avoid castoreum extract in our daily diet, but what I’d really like to know was how some trapper discovered 80 years ago that a beaver’s anal secretions would be such a vital additive in everything from perfume to chewing gum?

  3. Hey, if the French can get into snails, goose liver, and fish eggs, why can’t somebody else be into beaver butts? After all, it gets COLD during those long Canadian winters, and them Canucks need SOMETHING to keep them busy…. 😉

Push it out, shove it out, waaaaay out...

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